You fool!
You idiot! 
Too tough for you?
How did you manage that?
That was the absolute worst performance I've ever seen.
Is this your first time playing this game? Looks like it.
I hate to tell you this, but that sucked.
That was awful.
Only someone very special could fail like that.
Do you understand how to operate these controls? Do you need an adult?
Pro Tip: Complete the mission objectives properly to not lose.
All you had to do was pass the damn mission.
Aw shit, here you go again.
I can't say I've ever seen someone fail like that before, I'll be honest.
That's a good candidate for a Top GTA V Fails video.
Oh, is it too hard for you? Too hard? TOO BAD!
Perhaps you should consider using cheat codes.
You must have done that on purpose, right? How else could you have failed so badly?
At this rate, you'll be lucky to finish this game before human life ceases to exist.
There were so many things wrong with what you just did that I'm not even sure where to begin.
What kind of player are YOU anyway...?!
Rockstar would like you to know that after seeing that, they have revoked your permission to continue playing this video game. Please close it now and never touch it again, for everyone's sake.
I believe people these days would call that a rather small brained move.
You talk a big game but you certainly don't bring it.
You've got some little bitty chiquita cojones.
Man, you're a buster.
Always letting the homies down, eh?
Absolute garbage.
Absolutely terrible performance.
I'm sorry to inform you that
There goes my burrito!
Why did I move here?
Alt+F4 for free shark cards.
We'll get 'em next time.
Better luck next time.
WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT!
NO!
That was quite a shame.
Aww, I actually feel a bit bad about that one.
If you have been affected by this tragic loss, feel free to vent your frustrations in our Rainbomizer Discord.
Don't let this failure get to you - take a break and calm your mind, and success will come to you.
Take a moment, do some breathing exercises, and come back at this with a renewed vigour!
A sense of overriding futility is a vital part of the process. Embrace it.
Oof, that was pretty painful.
Congratulations on your new world record for the worst failing of this mission in history!
Damn. I know just how you feel.
Sometimes I may mock your failings (like that one), but I do it out of love. <3
If these fails are getting to you, I heard Dr. Friedlander is an excellent therapist for you to work through your troubles.
Just bad RNG.
That was...something.
Aim towards the Enemy.
Failure is your opportunity to revise your strategy. 
"Success consists of going from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm." — Winston Churchill —
When taking Chop for a walk, Franklin can play fetch with him using the ball in the inventory.
"Never in the field of human conflict was so much owed by so many to so few." — Winston Churchill —
"Death is nothing, but to live defeated and inglorious is to die daily." — Napoleon Bonaparte —
"If a man has done his best, what else is there?" — General George S. Patton —
"Don't get mad, get even." — John F. Kennedy —
"That was an improvement, but it's not hard to improve on garbage. Try it again." — Captain John Price —
"The future influences the present just as much as the past." — Friedrich Nietzsche —
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